A startling revelation

I read this article in newspaper today about how someone’s sleeping position tells us about the person. The article spoke about various positions in which a person sleeps namely Foetus, Log, Yearner, Soldier, Freefaller and Starfish. Majority of the people, to be precise 41%, fall under Foetus; which is a staggering percentage of the total sample size. Even more startling is the fact that more than twice as many women as men adopt this position. All other categories commanded 15% or less of the total sample size. The article went ahead to say that the people who come under the Foetus category are tough on the outside but sensitive at heart.

A lot of my friends have had a certain past associated with them. When I say past, I mean some incident which had happened at an early age: adolescence or maybe even before that. Anything that happens at this age leaves a mark on us and we grow up with a regret or maybe even resentment. In most cases the person in question creates a layer around herself/himself. Not to say that these people are good or bad but they have certain issues which grows along with them; with age and with time. These issues could be lack of confidence, lack of trust, inferiority complex and in bizarre cases it even leads to paranoia.

I remember from my late school days about this best-est friend of mine whom I used to meet every day. Not that he is no more a friend of mine- we still are very close to each other but now live in different cities. He used to come to my place without absence and we would go out smoke and just sit somewhere and talk. I clearly recall every single day him telling me about his parent’s fights and arguments; what he felt about the same and the distaste that it created amongst the siblings. This is but a mild example of such cases. There are children that go through severe physical as well as emotional abuse; grow up with their parents’ fighting for divorce, with a lot of voluntary or involuntary social isolation; bad or neglected parenting and so on.

As mentioned earlier these people form a thick layer around them and proceed with a lot of caution. This never happens consciously and in most cases it is at a very sub-conscious level. The reason, from what I can perceive, is the fear that people can see right through them. They have various guards around them reminding not to trust anyone. Many a time they want to trust people but instinctively they refrain from doing so and are reticent. The problem is that most of us try and sympathise with such people when told about their past. What we don’t understand is that they grow up dealing with their past all by themselves and the last thing that they need is someone’s sympathy. What they actually want from us, as a friend or as a partner, is to be that someone who could perhaps just listen to all that they have to say, give a hug and that’s about it; which is all that they seek and all that they want.